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An associate artist of saltpeter, Adrian Gillott, went to perform in Japan recently. I asked him for a response and he sent me this delightful list:

Agedashitofu

Some of the things that I ruv about Japan:

1               The mispronunciation of love

2               Fried tofu

3               Bathing

4               The virtually hands-free toilet (not only does the lid rise as you approach, but the seat is warmed and it both washes your bottom and dries it)

5               Clapping to make sure that the gods are listening

6               The strangely accurate plastic models of food outside restaurants

7               The food – including sashimi, tempura, sticky rice, sukiyaki, yakitori, those rice balls with bean paste inside and fried tofu

8               The fact that people lock up their umbrellas but don’t chain their bikes

9               Phrases like “Chicken curry a lot of tools” (from a menu) and “A sheet is covered over a bed by itself, or tableware after a meal is carried to a return mouth” (from a youth hostel website)

10           Fried tofu

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